P'IPES rubric.
H/W +2 points
Copy a short scene from your writing and paste it into the 'comments' section. State what writing craft move or grammar technique you have used?
"Do the best you can until you know better. Then when you know better, do better." Maya Angelou
8 comments:
Thunder started to rumble like it was mad and lightning crackled like an evil laugh
My craft move was that I used my words purposefully to show not tell.
Bump his heart beated once. He saw the curtains rustle, but the windows were closed. Bump his heart beat again as he stepped towards his mobile phone. Out of battery. Bump skitter skitter skitter he heard it near the desk.
My craft move I am using here is using heartbeats as a countdown technique.
Something about his size. Size that felt a little hairy yet covered. Covered in something he didn’t want to know. Know he needed to get away. Away from this crazy place. Place that now both Oliver and Josh were ready to immediately leave and never come back.
In this section I used the craft move of ending a sentence and beginning the next with the same word.
I quickly climbed out of my bed, and padded as quietly as a mouse to the light switch, I reached for it, but what my hand met was not the cool plastic of a light switch, my hand met flesh, for a hand was already there…. I breathed in once, I breathed in twice….. I breathed in three times...
“AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!”
The craft move I'm using is using breathing as a countdown, I also used a metaphor.
The lights were off. This is a bustling hotel. Surely there had to be someone in this building other than them. Ted and Maria to one step toward the check in desk, ...two steps, ...three steps, ...four steps, there was no one in sight. All counters were covered with white
The craft move I used was countdown as how many steps.
One.
My foot slipped through for a split second.
Two.
Holes formed under the people around me.
Three.
“Shaaaaade!” someone shouted. In the commotion, it was impossible to tell who was who.
Four.
Everyone dropped through the rifts like flies.
Five.
Falling through endless space.
Countdown as craft move, with short sentences for craft move.
On the last day of school, something strange happened. As Jeff and his brother were on the bus going home, they saw a flash of light come from the trees. As the bus passed the flash of light, the could see a figure through the light. Jeff wasn’t sure of what he had seen, so he kept it to himself.
+2.
My tip to people using the 'countdown' method: try to put more details between each step of your countdown.
Post a Comment