Brag Sheet -Descriptive Narratives

Read these narratives below. They were chosen to be displayed because they contained clear sensory descriptions of  places in the story. Can you replicate this writng in Friday's assignment? Feel free to comment.

Walker Mountain


By Ansley

The comforting songs of the bluebirds and the vicious howling of nearby dogs filled my ears when I first stepped foot on Walker Mountain in Valle Crucis. A shimmering pond lay obediently at my feet like a king’s cocker spaniel. Fanned out bundles of oak leaves violently swayed above my head as if in a hurricane. The dazzling mountains glowed under the leader of the universe’s gaze. Crackling pine needles crunched softly under my warm bare feet. Walker Mountain felt like my new home, safe and cozy.

Once I was inside the rectangular, little house a bubbly feeling crawled up my spine that made me feel like I was on top of the world. The smooth, waxy maple floor slid under my feet like Michelle Kwan’s Olympic skates on the slippery ice. A delightful scent of pine wood drifted up my nostrils. The bright, glaring sun shone down onto the peaceful house releasing a forcefield to protect my family and my friends from any danger that might knock on our door. When we finally put our tired minds at rest after the last embers of the campfire had died down, the glowing moon and the twinkling stars watched over us like angels looking after their loved ones. As soon as I had strolled into the well-kept house, I knew it would be hard to leave it behind.

Sailing down the everlasting mound of lime grass, my chocolate hair whipped in my face covering up my bright blue eyes. The brilliant, red sled turned the corner and soared down the hill. My New Balance shoes screeched to a halt, and I flipped off the sled, tumbling the rest of the way down the grass. Tall trees were hurt after I had accidentally slammed into them. Never ending laughter, from my friends, echoed in my ears, for they had injured trees as well. Bogey, Mary and Kate’s yellow lab,   continued...

 The Time I Went To Ben And Jerry’s    
by Hannah
As I trudged in, I could smell a scent of sweet vanilla ice cream traveling up my nostrils. People were cluttered throughout the parlor. A soft breeze blew in my face as the glass door slammed shut. Marshall, my older brother, was chatting with my mom about the first day of 10th grade. After hearing the blabbering of Marshall and my mom for five minutes, we finally swayed up to the sparkling counter. The generous lady at the front counter had a tie-die shirt on that said Ben + Jerry’s in big, bold letters. The walls around her had cows on them everywhere I turned. I thought as if I were at a farm. I excitedly ordered my favorite ice cream, Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough, and plopped myself down at a shining table. As I dropped down, I glimpsed at my mom and Marshall paying for her ice cream, his ice cream, and my ice cream. When I scooped ice cream into my mouth, I suddenly felt like I was in heaven. The Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough melted on my tongue as if it were a snowflake that had fallen from the sky. I took another bite, and it danced in my mouth as I swallowed the tasty treat. A massive smile came upon my face when the creamy, sweet goodness shot down my throat. Strutting the out glass door, I still could taste that outstanding taste of Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough. To feel that magnificent taste was like going to NYC for the first time. The scent of the sweet Vanilla Ice Cream and the tasty Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough faded away as I pranced out of the building.

Petit Saint Vincent Boat Ride
by Maddie

As the cool summer wind whipped my tangled, wet hair, and the salty Caribbean water splashed my face, I knew this was a time to remember. The inner-tube swung back and forth as the small boat tugged Tyler, me, and my friend, Anabell through the rapid waves. White wave trails followed the boat through the open waters as we had yelled, “Faster! Faster!”. A shiver declined down my back as the cold breeze howled in my ear. Suddenly, the inner- tube’s stiff, braided rope crossed with another boat’s anchor, and the ride took a turn for the worst. My clammy hands clung tightly to the rubber handle; however, my brother, Tyler,had let his hands slipped off. My eyes closed tightly in fright of what might happen next as Tyler crashed into the stern of another boat. I gasped for air, because I had been enclosed underneath the inner-tube after it had flipped. From Tyler hitting is back on a boat, to me running out of breath, I would remember that moment for a lifetime.