Brag Sheet- Narrative

The way Thomas integrated the description of the scenery with  his action narrative was very impressive.

A Camping Trip to Remember

By Thomas Williams
   When the fading sunlight prickled through the trees onto my fellow campers walking on the forest trail, we looked almost like ants marching in a line to get back to their anthill. The trail was weathered into the woods and clear over the dense, overgrown jungle of forks in the dirt trail. The smell of the cool Appalachian summer air put me at ease. My conversation was interrupted and stopped as cheers erupted from the crowd of traveling boys. We had reached our campsite; it was green river pasture.
   Surprisingly, even though it was just a two-mile trip, all of the campers seemed as tired as dogs. The sound of panting hit at my eardrums. Chris and Patrick, two boys in my cabin, toiled with tarps for a blue tent. While they were at work, I put on my Crocs and plunged into icy Green River. I felt energetic as I paddled in the stream. I found a place where the current was not very strong and picked up a rock. I pulled my arm back and let loose a hard sidearm. The rock skipped once, twice, three times. The smell of enchiladas on the cook stove made my mouth water. The yellow sun from earlier had become a golden ball above the horizon struggling to stay where it was. The ominous cloud cover soon crept over it. David, my camp counselor, called for us to come and eat. I had been ready a long time ago!
   Dinner was happiness for my taste buds, but no one had enough of it. Everyone took any chance they could of getting more food even if it meant stealing off other people's plates. Five or six people only got a half serving! Five counselors can only carry so much!
   When the final ray of sunlight disappeared from view, few of us had flashlights. David set to work building a campfire. It took a while before the the taste of s'more finally reached my mouth. When it did, the smell of smoke was almost better than the smell of s'mores.
   It was midnight before sleep came. Sleep was what everyone needed, but no one was able to get more than an hour of it. My dreams were brought to reality by the pitter-patter of rain on the foot of my sleeping bag. The bag was taking on water rapidly while lightning flashed in the sky above. The rain stopped as fast as it had begun. All 40 campers stumbled out of the makeshift tent and onto the soft, drying, ground. I listened to the sound of shuffling cards from the pack Martin had brought along. As the sun began to peek through the clouds hours later, David and the other counselors helped us pack our backpacks, sleeping bags, and tarps. After that, I vowed never to go camping again. That promise won't last very long!